Lucy has clogged the toilet for the third time. She stuffs whole rolls of toilet paper down there, and then flushes so it is harder to fish out. I have been trying to leave the paper up high out of reach - but last night I forgot and went to bed.



Carrie the plumber....


People often ask if I want more kids, and I often feel like saying:
"Are you serious? Sometimes I don't even want this one!"

I think the people who tell you how to raise kids are the ones who don't have any. PRIME EXAMPLE: Supernanny. Yes, that's right, that woman has only been a nanny, she can go in and say "Here's how you fix these shitheads" and then waft out again while the poor parents struggle along with the new advice as best as they can. Don't get me wrong though, I actually love super nanny, and I do a lot of the things she does (but I do have the satisfaction of being able to say that I did it before ever watching the show). I am just really annoyed at the moment with people with no kids saying "Hey, do this!!" I was one, I know the ideals of parenting. But now I am a mommy I find it often goes out of the window when they wear down your resiliance like a miniature (which must be really tiny) John Howard. Because lets face it - it is just easier to let him do his thing.
I realise that all the non parents are smacking their foreheads in shock horror. But get off your pedestals for a sec, and talk to a real parent. Sometimes you just have to pretend you didn't see them lick the fly wire. Hell, maybe it is good for the immune system anyway....


In saying all of this, I actually consider myself to be a good parent. We read. We read the same favourites over and over, but we read dammit. So much that Miss Lucy can pick out a few letters, from those ridiculously tiny fridge magnets (which have disappeared under the fridge). Not bad for nearly three.
We do art. Colouring, play-doh, puppet making, and endless amounts of "mommy do baby.....pram.....mommy do it" which means I have to draw babies over and over.
We make tents, and go to the car park and she rides her bike.
She gets time out when she is awful, and she says please and thankyou mostly without prompting.
Sure, she has the odd tantrum for little to no reason, but she is still a terrible two for a few more months, we are not doing too badly.

I think the things that validate my experience as a parent the most are 1) other people telling me - friends, my parents, and even random people on the street or at the shops;
2) Lucy often says not only "I love you," but "I like you mommy," which to me is sooo much nicer - because you HAVE to love your parents, even if you don't really like them;
3) The fact that random men will smile at us and come and chat me up - I figure I must be an okay mum if the opposite sex aren't running away screaming. And although I always am just polite (just in case) they don't SEEM to be paedophiles.....

So there you go, mother of the year (although not very early in the morning, then I am like everyone else who gets woken up before dawn for any reason other than sex).

Now I just have to work on the MILF thing some more....